I had a good Thanksgiving holiday mostly because I was invited to spend it with Megan and her family down in Colorado Springs and I was able to bring Cooper with me. It was really weird being back in the Springs and driving farther south than Lone Tree. For some reason, I started feeling really angry and just...spiteful. I guess I have more demons than I thought that are still lingering in Colorado Springs. Although I will admit, that town has exploded beyond anything I thought it was capable of but then again, it exploded with shitty strip malls so I guess it was kind of expected.
Megan and I watched New Moon and I swear, that was worse than Twilight. Luckily we only paid like, 5 dollars to watch it but it was still 4 dollars more than what I would be willing to spend my money on. Afterwards we went back to her parent's house and got ready for dinner. Megan's mom invited her co-worker and husband over for dinner and they were a lot of fun. Megan's dad and Ed watched football and talked about guy things while the ladies played board games and card games and got drunk. It was a good time.
Megan and I didn't talk too much, she got in earlier the night before but stayed up until almost 2 in the morning talking with her mom and stuff. We did talk for awhile about Kristin, Dani, Tyson, Erin, etc. I'm planning on going out to San Antonio sometime in February so we're excited for that.
Wednesday night I went over to Erika's house to help her get ready for Thanksgiving since she had to make several dishes to bring and having a separate Thanksgiving with Clay. We ended up talking until around 11 and I really opened up to her and she to me. I'm really hoping that we become better friends because she is a genuinely nice, caring person. Plus I don't have many girlfriends here and it would be nice to have one that lives to close by.
Tyson left for Wisconsin last Friday and came back last night. During the week he was home, he texted and called me everyday and it was really nice :) He told me what his plans were, sent me random pictures of his trip back home, and I even talked to his little brother Trevor briefly on the phone. They sound exactly alike on the phone and I didn't really realize that it wasn't Tyson on the other end.
I also hung out with Austin Saturday night. We went to a hookah bar and then went to his place with a 6 pack of beer and some chips. We watched a movie and just hung out. Talked for a bit, you know, the usual. I told Tyson I was going out with Austin earlier in the evening and I texted him when I got home. He did ask me when I last hooked up with Austin and I was like, seriously? I'm going through this again? I guess that was a legitimate question but it kind of pissed me off because I'd like to keep the past in the past and he started telling me all this random shit that I never wanted to know about him. I guess that was our first real argument because I felt like he didn't trust me.
Anyway, he came over last night after he got in with some venison jerky (which is amazing by the way, way more delicious than beef jerky) and we had a pretty good night. It's amazing how much I missed him even though I spent most of our time apart wondering about how serious I wanted to take this relationship and him. I guess I'm still guarded with him but that doesn't mean that I didn't miss his company or, sadly, getting attention from him. We watched Sport Center and talked about just random stuff and he showed me pictures of his trip.
He kept telling me how much he missed me and I kind of felt bad because while I did miss him, I had plenty of other stuff to keep me occupied and I sure as hell didn't send him any texts first. I also told him that we've been away from each other way longer than 9 days and he said "well, I've grown a lot closer to you since so I miss you more." I know he's genuine and stuff, and maybe I'm scared of falling in love or having someone fall in love with me, but I don't even know if I want that from him. It's not that he isn't nice or affectionate, or anything, it's just...I don't know if loving him is even a good idea. He doesn't live here, he has so many qualities I never wanted in a guy and at what point do you say, "yeah, this has been fun but I don't want anything else from you"?
Megan thinks I'm still hung up and hurt by Corey. God I hate him, I really wish he'd disappear. Anyway, I've been trying to keep him out of my life, I blocked him from a bunch of stuff but he still manages to get a rise out of me. It's like he knows me so well that he can manipulate me into talking to him. I can't give him all the credit though, I still want to talk to him and when I see or hear something funny he's the first person that I think would find it funny. Lynn told me that I need to set boundaries for myself and actually keep those boundaries well established. She says that as soon as I let them get a toe over the line, they know that they can cross the boundary at anytime. I just need to realize that I need those boundaries and I'm setting those up for myself and that I need to respect them as well.
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