Things have been going relatively well for me during the last couple of weeks. Tyson and I have, I think, managed to work through everything and I'm seeing a trend in my bad moods. I hate being such a girl about it, but shit, I PMS hardcore. I'll have to talk with my doctor and possibly go on different birth control to try and maintain that.
Tyson started working night shifts and hopefully, this week will be the last week he does so. It has been really hard on us because we weren't able to talk to each other after work like we normally do. As soon as I get off of work, he has to go in so we've been talking for about 10 minutes every night when he takes his dinner break. He calls it lunch break and I'm like, no, it's dinner, it's late but whatever. That has nothing to do with anything. This should be his last week on night shift so hopefully, when I go out there next week he'll be back to day shifts. I'm really glad I'll never have a job where I need to worry or care about night shifts.
Last Friday after work, even though we were tired, David, Mitch, Julie and I went out for happy hour and a light dinner. We went to Root Down and had a lot of fun. I haven't seen Mitch since before he went to Argentina so it was good catching up with him. I think I like his version of Argentina better than the way David told it. It's weird hearing the two sides of everything; David is much more detailed and descriptive while Mitch gets straight to the point. Anyway, Mitch was in one of his snarky, bitchy queen moods so he was saying a lot of really inappropriate things right when the waitress came around, and was saying kind of mean things to Julie. But at least she dishes it back to him now, so really, it was just funny.
All in all, dinner went well, Mitch and I talked a bit about my fucked up family, which I'll get into later, and we talked a lot about the positive changes I've made in my life. It's really flattering in ways because so many people are vocal about all the changes I've made because now I actually voice how I'm feeling and confront issues a little better, and I'm really making an effort of bettering myself. On the other hand, I really wonder how fucked up I really was; especially after hearing so many people tell me that they're so proud of me and saying things like, "Wow, Alisa! Good for you!" I guess I must have been in a really bad place and to think, it has almost been a year since I moved from Lone Tree.
Anyway, my fucked up family: sometime last week Mr. Kim called me with the most horrifying news I've heard in awhile. No, my dog Sari didn't die, but my dad's going to Korea in April. I seriously felt my heart stop and this overwhelming sense of dread washed over me and made me want to kill myself because it was that bad, I'm not being dramatic. Anyway, after worrying about it and thinking horrible things like my dad going over to my grandparents and dragging my mom back to America, or blowing his brains out because my mom won't go with him, I ended up having an equally, if not more so, disturbing conversation with my dad about going to Korea. He said a couple of really good things; for instance, that he wants to move on and he's ready to do so. He's going to sign the divorce papers and talk to my mom's younger brother and parents and asking them if it would be ok with them to see my mom. The kicker was, he actually asked me if that sounded ok! He wanted my opinion! So as to not be discouraging, I told him that sounded like a really good plan and that he was the bigger person for finally moving past this.
And then all the gross things came out. He told me he's going to Japan for a couple days and while I was like, why the hell are you going there? I wish he never told me. Apparently he and some lady living there have been exchanging emails and god knows what else so he's basically going there to fuck her. He kept going on about how he hasn't been laid in forever and all those gross, terrible, nasty things you never ever want to hear from your dad. I was walking Cooper at the time and I couldn't get my dad to stop talking even though I told him I was starting to feel sick and I seriously contemplated walking into oncoming traffic just to end the conversation. Anyway, I felt even more dead inside after that conversation and I had a horrible, sour taste in my mouth like I just threw up bile for 8 hours.
I guess I'm kind of glad that my dad's finally going through with the divorce. Hopefully he keeps his word and my mom keeps her fucking mouth shut when they see each other. I know she'll want to say something and it'll just piss off my dad and then he won't sign the papers so really, it's all up to my mom to keep her comments to herself. Ew, so that was my godawful conversation with my dad. Although, since he was in such a good mood, I told him about Tyson. He was surprisingly ok with me dating. He also told me to travel the world while I'm still young and to never have children because they hold you back and suck the life out of you. Thanks, Dad.
Anyway, that's what Mitch and I talked about. After dinner and like, 4 drinks each, Mitch was ready to go home and David, Julie and I being the lushes went out to another restaurant/bar to keep drinking because that's what we do best. We went to Lola's and had sangrias and chips and guacamole; which I have to say, was really delicious. During the time, I had texted Fran and he was out in Lodo so he invited me to go to a concert with him whenever I was done drinking with my friends. David and Julie were getting ready to call it a night at around 8:30 and I wasn't, so I went to hang out with Fran at some terrible punk rock show at The Marquis.
Tyson had called while I was at Lola's and we didn't talk long since 1. I was eating and 2. It was really loud in the restaurant. He told me to call him later but he sounded really depressed or something so I texted him when I got to the Marquis which, in hindsight, was probably a bad idea because I was with Fran by then. So Tyson was really bitchy the entire time I was hanging out with Fran, who was a gentleman by the way, and I had to go off towards the bathroom to talk with Tyson like, 3 times on the phone. Fran told me that Tyson really, really likes me and I replied with, "I know." I guess Tyson told Fran about our problems from the last couple weeks because Fran brought them up but didn't really talk about it. It was actually a lot of fun, his friends were really nice and made sure I didn't get trampled by the hordes of really angry punk rock kids and they kept buying me drinks which wasn't helping my situation. By the time I got home, I had been drinking for almost 8 hours straight. So not good for my liver...
After the show, Fran and I were gonna go to a drum and bass show somewhere but when I told Tyson that, he flipped out and I ended up going home around 1 in the morning. Tyson and I talked on the phone for almost 3 hours and I kind of wish I had recorded it or something, because I know we talked about a lot of deep meaningful stuff but I couldn't remember all of it. I called him out on his insecurities and told him it was unfair of him to take it out on me. We talked about more of our relationship issues and insecurities and made a headway in them to the point where I think both of us are satisfied by telling each other our issues.
So over the weekend, we talked on the phone for probably 20+ hours. He obviously had nothing to do over the weekend and neither did I so we spent most of the days talking on the phone about really random shit. He still felt uncomfortable about our relationship although last night he told me that he realized that he's completely secure. I don't know what brought forth that revelation but we'll see if he really means it or if he just throws it in my face next time.
So all in all, things are fine. Things have definitely improved since last time I wrote and I'm really excited to see him next week.
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