I've never wanted to be a princess. I never wanted to be worshiped. But I do get jealous when I hear people telling me about all the wonderful things their boyfriends have done for them. Buying them massages, getting them flowers, doing weird shit that says, "hey, I'm thinking of you." I suppose it's our culture to measure love with something tangible such as presents.
I've never had a boyfriend who bought me massages or even cleaned the house to show he cared. A few times they've gotten me flowers but it was more in the "I'm sorry I fucked up but I'm honestly not sure what I did to piss you off" instead of "hey, I was thinking of you and bought you these." With each new guy I date, I would hope that maybe this one would be different from the last one.
Maybe it's just the pattern I have with dating. I date guys who seem so well put together and so caring only for them to show who they really are: self absorbed selfish assholes. Maybe "asshole" is a harsh word, but "jerk" doesn't seem extreme enough. Either way, I fall for them because they have all been very good at saying the things that makes a girl's heart melt. Words that you hang onto thinking that maybe he'll pull through and maybe he does care about you, your feelings, your thoughts, your everything.
Like I said earlier, I don't want to be treated like a princess. I want to be respected and taken seriously. For once I'd like to know what it feels like to know that you're the most important thing in someone's life. Just once I'd like to know what it feels like to have someone really go out of their way for you that isn't a friend. Mostly I just want someone who follows through with what they say; those words that made me melt, and smile, and hope that maybe, just maybe, you are completely different from all those assholes I dated.
I've never had a boyfriend who bought me massages or even cleaned the house to show he cared. A few times they've gotten me flowers but it was more in the "I'm sorry I fucked up but I'm honestly not sure what I did to piss you off" instead of "hey, I was thinking of you and bought you these." With each new guy I date, I would hope that maybe this one would be different from the last one.
Maybe it's just the pattern I have with dating. I date guys who seem so well put together and so caring only for them to show who they really are: self absorbed selfish assholes. Maybe "asshole" is a harsh word, but "jerk" doesn't seem extreme enough. Either way, I fall for them because they have all been very good at saying the things that makes a girl's heart melt. Words that you hang onto thinking that maybe he'll pull through and maybe he does care about you, your feelings, your thoughts, your everything.
Like I said earlier, I don't want to be treated like a princess. I want to be respected and taken seriously. For once I'd like to know what it feels like to know that you're the most important thing in someone's life. Just once I'd like to know what it feels like to have someone really go out of their way for you that isn't a friend. Mostly I just want someone who follows through with what they say; those words that made me melt, and smile, and hope that maybe, just maybe, you are completely different from all those assholes I dated.
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